Caring For Yourself During Menopause

Menopause is the untold story--but it doesn鈥檛 need to be.

鈥淪ome women have a difficult time during menopause in part because it鈥檚 not discussed,鈥 explains Victoria Wilkins, PhD, assistant professor of psychology in clinical psychiatry.

Menopause may be clinically defined as the end of a woman鈥檚 menstrual cycle, Dr. Wilkins adds, but in reality, 鈥淚t鈥檚 a transitional process that can take many years, so we need to be talking about this earlier and heading into it with more awareness.鈥

Here are four ways women can care for themselves throughout menopause.

Menopause is real.

Although some women are asymptomatic as they experience menopause, many women can undergo a wide range of physical menopausal symptoms鈥攆rom hot flashes and night sweats to mood changes to low libido.

These physical experiences can be severe, and both women and their physicians should take them seriously and understand the emotional impact they can have.

鈥淭here is support around this,鈥 Dr. Wilkins says, including the reproductive psychiatrists who offer services to Weill Cornell patients. 鈥淲omen don鈥檛 have to suffer without information and intervention, or feel as if they鈥檙e dealing with a collection of whimsical or frivolous complaints.鈥

Acknowledge the tougher days.

The stage of life during which menopause typically occurs can be demanding.

鈥淢any women are in the caregiver role where they鈥檙e caring upwards and downwards generationally鈥攖he sandwich generation of being responsible for both children and parents,鈥 Dr. Wilkins observes.

Those responsibilities, coupled with work demands and physical changes, can be overwhelming. Women should understand their unique role and the emotional strains it can create with some compassion--for themselves.

Go back to 鈥渢he basics.鈥

When women are so focused on others, and responsibilities outside of themselves, women sometimes forget the most fundamental things we need to do to take care of ourselves: sleep, eat, and exercise.

鈥淭his can seem simple but be hard to change,鈥 Dr. Wilkins says. 鈥淏ut we need to look at these factors and maybe not tackle them all at once, but maybe make one small change at a time.鈥

For example, perhaps simple time management can make these basics possible again鈥攕etting reminders and taking breaks when needed.

Embrace self-care.

Because 鈥渢he basics鈥 aren鈥檛 always sufficient.

Sometimes women need to take time off: an hour, a day, a change of scenery--even a power nap. Do it.

And remember that self-care can mean not doing everything alone. Asking for help, whether from family, friends, or co-workers, can go a long way to lifting stress. Therapists can help with cognitive reframing techniques, which can allow someone to change a stressor into a learning experience, for example. It鈥檚 a way of changing the way people view something (in this case, perhaps menopausal symptoms) to change their experience to it.

Sometimes the concept of caring for oneself can mean being protective and realistic, Wilkins says. Women can set limits and reevaluate what needs to be accomplished (and perhaps when).

鈥淚t鈥檚 okay to chip away at something,鈥 Dr. Wilkins adds. 鈥淭his idea that everything has to be done at once and perfectly is totally unrealistic.鈥

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